things are back to normal again here in goose bay. i think i lived last week in a haze just trying to recover from the trip --- couple nights of going to bed at 8:30 even which is fairly ridiculous for me. just got back from a really good church service --- i was playing piano / singing harmonies and it was thoroughly fun... am playing for a women's retreat this weekend (i think i'm on all day saturday) so hopefully that is just as fun.... anyways, church was followed up by a game of settlers with mike and jeff --- we haven't played in FOREVER (over a month at least) -- so it was a good time getting back into the catan relationship we have going there -- the game does not bring out the best in us all the time... but i think that's what makes it so fun. it was also the first time in 2+ weeks that the 3 of us hung out... so that was kind of nice... maybe next time other mike wont be working and the 4 of us can get back into the game.
mike asked me tonight on the ride home what i thought of goose bay... and i realized that most of the time it really feels like home now. i have a place in the town and people are good at making you feel appreciated for the things that you do - whether that be playing piano / singing in church to teaching choir (particularly concert/performance related outcomes people notice). so although i miss the london crowd and the fam sometimes --- the goose bay family is a really good substitute.
that being said - i can't wait for the european adventure this summer.... super pumped!!! all ash clouds better be disappaited by then!

Day 2 of the easter adventure and i'm on hour 8.5 of sitting on the bond and we have another 5-7 hours left...

we left goose bay yesterday at 7:20am meeting up with matt and megan (aka silver fox) at tim's and then the road... we spent the next 8 hours on an extremely muddy dirt road with the occasional patch of hard dirt that was relatively pleasant to drive on. We saw some crazy drifting snow and whatever else and passed the time napping (me and megan / not jeff and matt who were driving), coming up with crazy millionaire ideas over walkie-talkies (again - me and megan ---- the boys lost their privileges quickly) and talking and singing along to some music. at 4ish we hit red bay and PAVEMENT - hurrah!!!! then we ate some bologna sandwiches before continuing down to forteau and l'anse au claire where we were staying last night.

we hung out with jeff's dad's sisterinlaws sister (or something like that) and were up again this morning at 5am to be in line for the bond at 5:30am

now we've been sitting on here for ever --- we've napped, read, played some cards, wandered around and done a whole lot of nothing...

the current excitement is the cafeteria opening at 5...

the plan is to get into gander tonight really late...

update again eventually

i am pretty sure i have an ear infection. only pretty sure because i refused to go waste my time in the emergency room getting it checked out...

oh well - all the online stuff said it should go away on its own... here's hoping.

last night i had an evening of being truly me. it was one of those nights that nothing special really happened - however whatever did happen was an experience.

for the first time in a while it wasn't about work or church or "miss". just 5 friends hanging out and playing a game of catan.

i'm sure i will fall back into that pit of the blahs that was latched pretty tightly the other day... but for today - and yesterday ---- things are good.

it's 3:50am. i have been in bed since 12. probably not the best time to update this neglected little blog.
i made a realization this week... as much as i am enjoying goose bay my identity here is 99% as "miss visser". there are very few people in this town who even call me ashley let alone try and get to know me as a human being. for all the children and their parents and most of the other teachers they just know me as 'miss'. most details about my life are figments of their imaginations... just details that they have made up. somedays i feel like i am losing ME. most days i realize that is ridiculous and that isn't happening.
this is a long weekend.
last night i went to the bars in town for the first time since moving here. it was actually an amusing time. i was meant to teach highschool - that has nothing to do with the bars... but it was discussed again. if only that were a possibility right now.
today i woke up to no phone or internet signal. it is not abnormal for one of the two to be out - but for both to be down at the same time made me feel exteremely isolated. this is also ridiculous as i could have easily gotten in my car and driven anywhere had i needed to talk to someone. both signals were restored by 3pm and my 'lame life' was able to continue. i did nothing all day but watch gilmore girls --- i didn't even watch the olympics.
which brings me to another point --- as much as i'm obsessed with media of all kind - i feel that we can see too much. the fact that i can watch a real life person fly off a luge track and fling into a pole and die disturbs me a bit.
another friend got engaged this weekend... seems like it is the season...
it is now 4:10 and i will try to fall asleep yet again this restless evening.

i have lots of thoughts rolling around in my head but no energy to express them.

i love labrador.

i guess that will have to do.

so i've been living here for 4 months now... some things i love / some things i don't.

things I love:
- that everywhere i go i know people
- the opportunities that are available (ie. theatre / other artsy stuff)
- hugs from the kids
- that i can go to the post office and while in the main office picking up a parcel buddy says - oh there's a letter for you in the general delivery pile - hang on for a second without me even asking someone to look...
- how concerned everyone is about your life
- that the airport is 5 min away and therefore you always have a ride
- random candy christmas trees so christmas can "throw up" here too
- christmas lights

things I don't love:
- that everywhere i go i know people
- how concerned everyone is about your life
- that the kids know everything about me and what i do because of items 1 and 2
- that the weather is like southern ontario: gross and slushy

today is remembrance day. in ontario - it is a day where we go about our business and at 11 everyone stops and reflects usually in school assemblies --- i've always thought what we did was good - however, moving to labrador has opened my eyes to what the rest of the country is doing. from what i know - here, bc, and alberta all take the 11th of november off from work and school and have huge local celebrations and remembrance ceremonies. in hv-gb it is particularly prevelant as we have such a huge military history here. in our school ceremony (which we had yesterday) we had members of the colour guard, the base chaplain, and people from the legion. i was told early on that this was one of the biggest assemblies that this school has - and it didn't disappoint. the music part went well - including my loverly brass ensemble who were so nervous - but they pulled off the last post quite well. it was good - remembrance was more deliberate than i'm usual.
today was different. there was a service this morning in the woods on base, and a town wide parade and ceremony at the legion at 11am. i did not go to either. i spent my day working on report cards - not that i got far... at all... but i tried.
tonight was something new. the olympic torch came through hv-gb tonight and since i am part of the community choir i was a participant in the ceremony. pam, nick, and i went together and were quite surprised at the amount of people pouring into the park. it seems like the whole town came out to celebrate together. it was really nice just to sit outside in the FREEZING cold air and complain about our freezing toes while just chilling with everyone from the town and watching the torch run in.
i guess you should check out cbc and see if we were on there... peter (one of the news guys from cbc here - in the play with me - and in the community choir) was there with his camera - so i guess it's a possibilty. we were up on stage twice - once to sing a song that no one i was standing around remembered - fortunately it's super easy and we were singing with over 100 grade 2 and 3 students who really know the song. we later came up when the flame was on the stage to lead everyone in o canada - it was good times.
we decided to leave with the flummies came onstage so that we could beat the rush. i dropped nick off and then pam and i went back - as soon as i came inside i heard loud bangs - so i looked outside to see a huge fireworks show going on over the trees. the view was better than sitting on the deck at home and only the low ones were slightly difficult to see through the trees - but you could still see them.
overall - great day :)

so update: mostly because jen told me i had to...
life has been really busy lately.
emotions have been pretty steady on the 'not super excited about life' but definitely no where near hating it.
due to living alone and working on the opposite end of the school - i can end up going for days without talking to any other adults - beyond the quick pass off of students talk.
that being said - i LOVE my apartment -- especially now that things are all homey like.
hv-gb is an interesting little town but i sort of wish we could pick it up and move it within driving distance to... anywhere really. the people that i'm meeting are really cool and i'm glad i've met them.
saturday nick and i spent the day cooking up a taco chili and chicken and rice casserole so that i'd have food to eat this week. charlotte called in the middle of that so she came over for dinner and then we spent the night playing mario party.... lots of tears, laughter, and pouting had by all.
tomoro is the remembrance day assembly - kind of enjoy that nl gets remembrance day off... so i don't have work on wednesday - just have the good old olympic torch ceremony to look forward to.
another interesting thing about this town is the importance of the arts. there is a new theatre around here and my name / picture has been in the paper twice in conjunction with the theatre and i've only been here for like 3 months.
so in conclusion to this -- life is good.

i have been here for 2 weeks now. it sort of feels like forever. it's a little unreal how far away i actually am from everyone that i know and love... i have taught for 3 days total and am very exhausted. it took a while to get used to management in this age group --- but by today things were much smoother sailing.
todays highlights:
*a grade 5 class that was a lot of fun and very productive... good things will happen with that class.
*flyup --- my school has a house system (think harry potter) so today all the new students [and teachers] got "sorted" i am now a golden eagle which i guess is exciting... we came in first place in the tug of wars today... first overall i guess --- our 4/5s came in 2nd and our 6/7s came in 1st... and the other 1st place team came in last for their other one... therefore we're the best :P
*after school made my way over john and kathleen's where it seems i spend a lot of my time... john fixed my car and we had dinner and then kathleen and i 'shot the shit' for a bit.... or rather until 10 when i realized i should prolly leave :P
*i have soooo much more to say --- but am absolutely exhausted
good night